So often people find themselves scurrying away on a hamster wheel and can not decipher how they even got on it in the first place OR how to get off it! It’s as if one day life is just a turmoil of fast-paced living, stress and overwhelm, yet there is no one particular thing they can attribute to arriving there!
I remember that distinct moment this occurred in my own life. It was as if I was standing on the edge of a cliff with ferocious waves crashing all around and I knew, even just one monster was going to sweep me over the edge. I knew, ever so acutely, there would be no swimming to safety should that happen.
I spent 12 months with water lapping at my ankles. My husband and I had made some life decisions that were not playing out as we had imagined. It was stressful. We were incredibly busy and felt as though every minute was spent in damage control. We were scampering to keep things in check, yet it was exhausting.
But like a lightning bolt from the thunderstorm we had found ourselves in, we were guided to address the deeper ’cause’ for the symptoms we were experiencing. What had caused us into a shitshow of epic proportions? How had we walked ourselves into these experiences? What had led us to the hamster wheel and how the f*ck were we going to get off?
In my experience, when we take the time to evaluate our life experiences, who we are and what leads us to the edge of the cliff, there will be a very distinct disconnection between our VALUES and our CHOICES. What this leads to is the decimation of all that we are striving for to realign us with our highest values.
So let’s break this down~
My husband and I made decisions about our financial position. We had chosen to invest to ensure we had a secure retirement. Noble, I guess, EXCEPT our highest priority in regards to our shared values, was Family and Connection. Yet our investing journey had led us to focus so much on wealth-creation that it had impacted on our family connection.
When we do this, when we unconsciously move away from our highest values, we will f*ck things up every which way but Sunday, to bring ourselves back into alignment. Things will begin to crumble and erode, pile up and cause such discomfort, that we will find ourselves on the edge of varying cliffs!
So, how does one step back from the cliff, step off the hamster wheel and realign themselves with what feels truly important? Well, you have to get really honest with yourself. You have to address what your top values are and then decipher if you are living a life that reflects those values.
Are you ensuring that you are focusing on what your highest values are? Are your actions, words, decisions in alignment with what you value the most? Are you living a life that is congruent with what you value? If not, why not and if not, what small steps can you take to bring those things into harmony?
𝐖𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐕𝐚𝐥𝐮𝐞𝐬 𝐀𝐫𝐞 𝐖𝐞 𝐋𝐢𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠?
Sometimes we fall into the trap of living someone else’s values. We are born and raised in environments that can impact our ability to stay true to ourselves. Our parents have influence, our siblings have influence, our teachers, friends, peers, work colleagues all have influence. Media has influence, pop-stars have influence, politicians, governments, doctors, all have influence. We spend our whole life being influenced.
We can also find ourselves on the edge of that cliff purely because we are living a value system that doesn’t match our inner truth. We are influenced to live a life of conformity and expectation and we are oblivious to it until it becomes all too overwhelming. It is at this very point that self-awareness and honesty are crucial.
𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐃𝐨 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐕𝐚𝐥𝐮𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐌𝐨𝐬𝐭?
So, you are overwhelmed, confused, anxious and stressed. You are aware this is not how you would like your life to be but you’ve arrived here and you have little to no energy to work out how to turn this sh*t show around?
This is the perfect time to ask yourself~
What do I value the most?
Make a list. Sit with it. Analyze it. Feel into it.
Now ask yourself~
Are my life choices, actions, words, decisions in alignment with what I value most?
Chances are they are not. It is common to wander away from what we value. With so many influences, opinions, pressures and commitments in our external worlds it can be challenging to commit to our internal world. It can be difficult to turn inwards and recognise why we have been led away from what we truly value.
Yet, when we can do this when we can recognise what has influenced our path and learn ways to turn back towards our own value system, our life can change dramatically. There are beautiful lessons that come from a deeply introspective journey. This level of inner FREEDOM is incredibly powerful!