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You’ll make a rod for your own back
Anybody else hear this jewel of wisdom when they were in the midst of raising their babies?
I think it’s one of the most unhelpful comments anybody could make.
It diminishes the natural instinct & love a mother feels and propels her straight back into the ‘rules’ she should be following.
As if in some way, her babies needs are NOT the main focus… just what social/family/community expectations are.
At a time where a mumma desperately wants to do the best (note* not the right thing because their is no right or wrong) for her bubba, she does not need a plethora of opinions suggesting she’s not!!
I can assure you the confusion between what felt best for my family AGAINST the ‘that’s not right’ information did nothing for my mental health.
We have natural, gut instinct. If we quieten the outside jargon, (which would solve the ongoing confusion) I know so many more mummas (and papas) would just do what needs to be done.
Loving our babies, kidlets, teens will never look the same. What works for one may not sit with another. Love has so many languages and as long as we are loving our babes, there are no rods that really matter!!
Miss 7 now permanently sleeps in our room!! She’d been coming in every night anyway. When we have visitors her room becomes the guest bedroom so we have a mattress in there anyway.
In times gone by I’d worry about this. Children should sleep in their own room, blah, blah, blah!! Right now, it feels right, she’s happy, safe and so are we.
There’s no rod… she won’t be in there forever!! It’s taken me a long time to realise trusting ME (and my hubby) is the most precious gift I have as a mum.
Buying in to the confusing ‘rules, comparison, judgement’ of the outside world is what is burdening our precious families. Go your own way mumma… YOU know!!

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